just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
