Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
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