She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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