Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
