...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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