He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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