I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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