So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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