I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
