her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
