Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
