Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Randomize
