Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize