Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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