laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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