I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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