he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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