I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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