Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
My breasts were aching with rage.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
