this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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