Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
