we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize