tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I just found a bag of teeth...
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize