I'd wear matching sweaters with you
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
