You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
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