you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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