Are we in a gay sports bar?
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
