Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize