I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
