They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
She told me I should be a condom model.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
