I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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