So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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