I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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