Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
