your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
