i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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