your thong is hanging out like whoa
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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