Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
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