Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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