We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
