I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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