Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
