having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
