Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
