fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
i think i have herpe
just one?
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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