Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
