I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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