***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
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