I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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