I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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