fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
